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Delayed Ejaculation - Tips on how to solve this "issue"


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Posted

OP doesn’t say if he is circumcised or not.

circumcision can desensitise your ‘bell end’ and make finishing more difficult.

  • Like 2
Posted
On 20/03/2021 at 08:25, effewe2 said:

Ok, not too long ago, I used to give my Babes 45 seconds of pure pleasure....that includes 30 seconds of foreplay...but lately...even before Covid, I am having a hard time finishing within a reasonable time.   I could go for 90 minutes of pounding in all the positions known to man, and maybe I will come.  The end result is I must go to the Five Fingers..to get the job done.

Are my years of masturbating catching up to me?

Any tips on solving this...meditation?  Herbs?  Stop watching porn during the shutdown.

On the positive side, when I say ST 3 hours, I used up all the time.

How you masterbate could effect this. I had this problem not long ago. There is a thing called death grip syndrome you can look up. If you squeeze to hard you can desensitize your unit. From my research and experience if you stop masturbating for a week or 2 it helps alot when trying to cum during sex. Using a pocket pussy instead of your hand when masturbating will prevent this. Also if you are "pounding" for a long time your unit will get desensitized. Thats why if you can get past the first few minutes you go into sport fucking mode. Try taking little 20 to 30 second breaks when you start to lose sensitivity to get the feeling back. You dont have to take it out just stop moving it. I normally suck on a titty or something so I'm not being weird just sitting there. Hope this helps.

Posted

I'm guess I'm finally beginning to "look" old enough that when I can't, the girls just brush it off as age and say it's OK.

Used to be a struggle when they'd look at it as something they were doing wrong, or ask what's wrong with me, and want to just keep trying... Especially when it was obvious they weren't really enjoying it, just some crazy misplaced sense or obligation it seemed.

A couple tips I found that help:

Make sure the condom fits. Should be sort of almost loose, you should slide inside the condom to create some friction. Otherwise, there is no sense of friction, and it doesn't work...

Pee first. If I am trying not to pee, I can't ejaculate. Particularly relevant to morning sex.

Drink lots of water. Everyone says this, and honestly, I kinda think it helps, maybe. But at least I'm not getting thirsty as I'm "chopping the wood"...

Alcohol and even red bull don't help. I've heard some studies that ibuprofen also dulls ALL sensations (in general, which I believe will add to the problem), not just pain.

Posted
1 hour ago, little_me said:

I'm guess I'm finally beginning to "look" old enough that when I can't, the girls just brush it off as age and say it's OK.

Used to be a struggle when they'd look at it as something they were doing wrong, or ask what's wrong with me, and want to just keep trying... Especially when it was obvious they weren't really enjoying it, just some crazy misplaced sense or obligation it seemed.

A couple tips I found that help:

Make sure the condom fits. Should be sort of almost loose, you should slide inside the condom to create some friction. Otherwise, there is no sense of friction, and it doesn't work...

Pee first. If I am trying not to pee, I can't ejaculate. Particularly relevant to morning sex.

Drink lots of water. Everyone says this, and honestly, I kinda think it helps, maybe. But at least I'm not getting thirsty as I'm "chopping the wood"...

Alcohol and even red bull don't help. I've heard some studies that ibuprofen also dulls ALL sensations (in general, which I believe will add to the problem), not just pain.

I agree with a lot of this besides trying to slide inside the condom than her. Finding good condoms is definitely critical, whether latex or not etc. 

There are so many variables I've found that has affected it.

Being sober for a few days in a row, quick session but easy to roll them back to back. Eventually ending up taking too long also.

Being extremely aroused leading to easy pops but being able to go again easily since the stimulus is so high. 

Hangovers, horny but hard to finish once but still horny after as well but too much work to go again sometimes.

Eat a big meal, no desire to interact at all sometimes.

Just need to be aware of yourself and what's the situation to do it. I don't mind pumping easily but then again I rarely do ST.

Posted
2 hours ago, J1066 said:

circumcision can desensitise your ‘bell end’

Indeed. At 12 years old ish, the doctor said something like "if you don't do this, you're never going to use that thing for anything other than taking a piss". Somehow that worked. But add a condom and too many beers, it can be quite difficult to cross the finish line. 

image.png.6eb5df3c4b99a4189996c2a21d8f14af.png

Posted
On 02/05/2022 at 10:53, Thomaz73 said:

I'm fucked!

I've read for the first time this entire thread.....

I'm 60 and I've gone from 15 seconds at the beginning of my career to almost never finishing without a lot of work and even then it's a 30% done and 70% tomorrow proposition.

For me, when I'm having difficulties, I do something that hasn't been really discussed as a possible solution yet in this thread.

I start talking dirty to my girls and then get them to join in with me.  

Asking her what she wants.

Telling her to ask me to finish with her.  (seems like thai speak for orgasm is "finis".

Telling her to describe what I am doing....  (Do you want slow?  Say it?  Do you want hard? say it!)

Getting my thai girl verbally involved, for me, helps a shit ton.

Quiet sex, is boring and unfinished sex.

I want hotel management to ring the room.  

I want the room next door to bang on the wall.

I'm too old to be embarrassed now.

Say my name baby.

Tell me to finis inside now, baby.

mmmm

 

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Posted
14 minutes ago, Pabloypablo said:

Tell me to finis inside now, baby.

Hmm, I sometimes get this without any encouragement from me, but it just doesn't seem to help.

"you finis now. Time up, take too long, finis now inside!!!"

  • 3 months later...
Posted

Great thread, about a little discussed, though more wide spread "problem" than is acknowledged...I experienced this on my recent trip to LOS, thinking like what the f@#k is wrong with me....here I am, amongst great looking gals, and I cant get my rocks off..or its getting hard to..For me, I think it could be condoms, and I am most certainly not going to have sex without them on, especially in an area like Pattaya.  Perhaps I need more of a connection than a Soi 6 gal or otherwise is able to give..ST and all.  Plus, I noticed on this trip, being a little more uptight about sex than normal...perhaps some form of performance anxiety?   And maybe related to this "problem".   Getting older now, so age could be playing a part, the penis is less sensitive than it used to be...Either way, its either psychological or physiological, or a combination of both?  Has any one seen a urologist to see whats going on downstairs re this condition, what sort of tests did they perform?  Thanks in advance...

Posted

When i was a teenager i would blow within 45 seconds,now at the age of 61 it's now 45 minutes plus

  • 5 weeks later...
Posted
On 28/05/2023 at 13:06, CamelToe said:

When i was a teenager i would blow within 45 seconds,now at the age of 61 it's now 45 

Same for me, except I can blow in 45 seconds even at 34, but that's fine with prostitutes cause all I want is to cum and continue enjoying my cold beer and not work like I'm on a treadmill.

Gets a bit tricky when with regular woman...

  • 6 months later...
Posted
On 24/02/2022 at 03:56, wolfgang68 said:

Try  Karsai  massage.

I had a lady do this for me in Chaing Mai Ive been trying to find one in pattaya but no one seems to know anout it

 

Posted
7 hours ago, DevaDava said:

I had a lady do this for me in Chaing Mai Ive been trying to find one in pattaya but no one seems to know anout it

 

I do it at Thanya massage shop at the corner Thappraya-Thepprasit road. 1500b.

Very professional licensed therapist,  explanation on her homepage, just google Thanya Karsai.

Its not a sexual massage, its done with gloves, but the goal is to reach a inner and outside orgasm.

I do it every few months to unblock my blood vessels in the imitate areas.

Ask for the boss Thanya, but she also has other experienced ladies

  • 9 months later...
Posted

Chiming in a bit late here.  Anyone taken any form of medication for this? Searching around indicates that Wellbrutrin may have an off label use for this.  My main issue seems to be condoms, and I am most certainly not going to raw dog it in a place like Pattaya.  HJs from happy ending massages were getting me off, but even that seems to be getting a little harder these days...some of these girls can be a little rough...anyhow, will attempt a hiatus from this hobby for a bit and see if a reset helps.  Though my libido is still good, those urges can cloud ones judgement, leading to the promise of the act being somewhat better than the actual. My sitangs worth, thanks in advance if youve had experience in over coming this...

Posted
4 hours ago, Maxbest said:

Anyone taken any form of medication for this?

I am not a doctor nor play one on tv.  But I suffered with this my entire life.  And I'm talking a much more severe case.

I do not believe there is any medicine that addresses retarded ejaculation - on or off label.  There have been some strange side effects that have not been replicated (Wellbutrin) but no medical basis behind it .

There are too many possibilities as to why this happens - and 99% of them all point back to our minds.

Don't have sex for three weeks then have relaxed condom-less sex in your own hotel room with a girl that checks all your boxes.  Do you cum in a reasonable time?  Then the issue is mental.

This is a forum of guys who have had sexual partners by the bucket full.  I don't believe we get as excited because of the sheer volume.  

I am jealous of the PE guys.  Lol

 

 

Posted (edited)

1. Stop jerking off as much

2. Exercise, and proper diet.

3. Alcohol is a huge factor. If I drink to the point where I'm drunk I can pound for what seems like forever. If I'm only buzzin' the effect is less severe.

Once you get all 3 fixed it's pretty easy. However, the biggest deterrent I've come across is condoms. Definitely reduces the feeling down there for both parties. 

Not a surprise for anyone but...did this test: Condom fucked for about 1 hour straight. Then I decided stupidly to take it off and resumed fucking and came within 5 minutes. Do NOT recommend doing so. Because while it felt amazing at the time shooting my load inside her, it came with risks. I eventually caught a minor STI that was cleared up within a week with antibiotics. But still.....the juice is not worth the squeeze IMO. 

Edited by enkae7317
Posted

Good posts fellas. Yeah did the same with a WL she got tired of me hammering away so offered off with the Dom and I took her up...heat of the moment thing. And yes I came. Now that I think about that it would seem condoms are one of the factors. As others have said there is more to it.  Fortunately I did not come down with any STIs. And yes..we generally have way more sex than others..just ask your married mates.Time to take a step back for awhile me thinks.

  • Haha 1
Posted
2 hours ago, enkae7317 said:

I eventually caught a minor STI that was cleared up within a week with antibiotics.

There are guys who would never admit to this, but ... Monger long enough and the odds are against you - you will get an std, or UTI ... and probably more than once.

This will tell you everything you need to know. 

 

"When it comes to number of partners, our female respondents averaged seven sexual partners during their lifetimes, while men averaged 6.4."

What's Your Number? | Superdrug Online Doctor

LIFETIME.   Some of you ho's do that in a day.  Lol

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1

 

 

  • 2 months later...
Posted

Similar problem for me: 50yo; circumcised; sometimes even takes a while bareback tbh. I presume it's mostly mental and slightly physical.

The thing that gets it done every time with no delays in a decent BBBJ though. I'm weighing up for my up-coming visit how much I want to invest in fucking vs BJs, because I enjoy hanging out (and making out) with the bar girls, but the services of a BJ Bar get me off much more reliably. Maybe GCs are the place for me.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

From my perspective, here is what has been successful.

Definitely enjoying her back side has made a significant improvement being able to finish in a reasonable time with little effort. So much it's becoming the preferred way 😉

A well performed BJ, especially with steller deep throat, add significant drooling, has had similar results and a much accelerated finish. 

Lastly, add some rimming and fingering by your cutie during sex, front or back, and BJ  stimulates less common feelings that excite the bodies performance. 

Contribute this to a few points. Vaginal all the cuties do, the excitement is not as it was.  And they are not as tight to be able to generate the necessary feelings. Exception a relatively new cutie from the farm or rural areas, the inexperience likely negates some of this. Anal, although becoming more common, still hosted by a much smaller group. And likewise , a good deep throat is hosted by an even a smaller group that can adequately give you the works. 

How much experience the girl has directly contributes to your performance. And how much she enjoys it and is willing to take the time generate those feeling thru her actions is a major factor, as well as how well she can control her body. 

Lastly how you conduct yourself, making her feel relaxed, appreciated, and stimulating her feelings is an equally important factor. Making her see how much enjoyment she is giving and in turn what she is receiving back further generates the feelings to perform.

Each girl has different levels of performance and skills. How you choose and the vibes you get negotiating should give a good feeling what to expect. 

All this has made significant improvement in overall experience and performance for both, or everyone if 3some or more 😁

Edited by Spaz-505
Add a point
  • Like 2
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

Wellbutrin can be a remedy for many and especially if you are taking anti-depressants, particularly SSRI'S. 

    Veteran soldiers (or others) with PTSD or anxiety often get this problem as SSRI's are often prescribed.

     This is something that one could inquire with a physician. Also, if ypu take many psin meds for chronic pain could make it harder, the most common problem us Tramadol.

  I have tried a medicine called Doxepin (Cabergolin) to shorten my refractory period and be able to recover quicker and had some success.

 

   Condom use will delay it for most and Cannabis use can do the same. 

 

 

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Finnmarkingen said:

-particularly SSRI'S. 
-common problem is Tramadol.

Word of truth.
Ssri:s and painkillers dozes your sensory system.

Edited by a3519
Posted

OK, so there are probably a few people here with SSRI or medical issues. But I strongly suspect the vast majority of cases are mental, whether you want to admit it or not. I can get there by myself, no problem. But with a woman, I'm focused on finishing and not just enjoying. I’m anxious. If I could take meds to fix it, I would. But it's probably best not to medicate for something that's entirely in my head. I don't know what the solution is, but probably some therapy. Maybe something for anxiety or relaxation. But there is nothing over the country for anxiety. It's either serious meds or bullshit supplements. I'm messing around with a small amount of alcohol or THC (a larger amount is counterproductive). 

One thing I do notice: I have a lot of nocturnal erections. Espically if I take Cialis. And I'm a bit sore and desensitized during the day, especially the morning. Might be having an impact on my function. 

Posted (edited)

I've had the same issue on and off for 30 years. Here are 4 things I've learned:

1. The morning session of a LT generally goes better than the night session. I'm just way more relaxed and comfortable with the girl. Comfort with the girl is, by far, the most important thing for me to finish in a reasonable amount of time. With regular girlfriends, it's never an issue. P4P is another story, especially when the girl is cold.

2. Weed makes a big difference. For me, it gets me out of my head while increasing desire. That said, if you have no tolerance built up it could ruin your night, so be careful and avoid edibles which are very hard to dose correctly. Get help from a certified stoner if you're new.

3. Boner pills are counterproductive. My body is fine. It's my mind that's fucked! Boner pills can actually make it harder to finish. If you can get a woody, avoid the dick pills.

4.  If you end up with a girl who meditates when you're together, join them if you know how. Done correctly, it can create a spiritual connection that, for me, speeds along finishing. It also shows the girl that you know something about her culture and differentiates you from most westerners. That can improve her attitude which is also very helpful towards the goal.

Edited by hr4me
  • Like 2
Posted
1 hour ago, Speakbottle said:

OK, so there are probably a few people here with SSRI or medical issues. But I strongly suspect the vast majority of cases are mental, whether you want to admit it or not. I can get there by myself, no problem. But with a woman, I'm focused on finishing and not just enjoying. I’m anxious. If I could take meds to fix it, I would. But it's probably best not to medicate for something that's entirely in my head. I don't know what the solution is, but probably some therapy. Maybe something for anxiety or relaxation. But there is nothing over the country for anxiety. It's either serious meds or bullshit supplements. I'm messing around with a small amount of alcohol or THC (a larger amount is counterproductive). 

One thing I do notice: I have a lot of nocturnal erections. Espically if I take Cialis. And I'm a bit sore and desensitized during the day, especially the morning. Might be having an impact on my function. 

It sounds like you have become hyperfocused on this. If it's mental, that just makes it worse. Try to quiet your mind.

If you can get hard alone, I suggest you ditch the boner pills. They can make it hard to finish for some guys.

  • Like 1
Posted

  Nocturnal erections is a good sign for sexual health.  It denotes you are having REM sleep, because this is the time when blood flow to penis and brain is the highest during sleep. If you have night erections is good.

 

  

  • Like 2

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