Be very careful with your condom - women inseminating themselves.

[6853395]

Hilarious, made my day.

 

Kudos for fessing up about the syringe mix-up.

 

Thanks for the kudos.  Here's more of what an idiot I am:

 

I put the "syringe" into my bag as "evidence".  I was considering filing a report with the Tourist Police just to document the incident.

 

Even though I normally text in Thai, I texted her in English, as a means of documenting this for legal purposes.

 

Here's the exchange of me further being paranoid.  Even she thinks I'm crazy!

 

 

[OMB]

5555555555

[Nando9999]

Haha fuck me, this is going to take some topping.

 

Though I am quite disappointed a police report didnt get filed before the truth was discovered.

[OMB]

What's the chances of her pulling off another condom?

[gimmesum]

Very funny thanks for the honesty indicating your mistakes lol.  However, I have always worried about women, particularly gfriends, trying to get pregnant from you here.  Be careful out there.  Best to throw the condom in a receptacle nearby.

[6853395]

What's the chances of her pulling off another condom?

 

She was legitimately being nice.

 

She's a very sensual lady and that's why I've been keeping in touch with her for nearly two years.

 

When she left my room, I checked and noticed the condom, with semen, in the trash.  It was the paranoia from the night before that perpetuated this today, believing the  cleaning lady discovered the syringe she left behind.

[6853395]

Though I am quite disappointed a police report didnt get filed before the truth was discovered.

 

That would have been too much.  I'm staying in a 4-star hotel, and I had the staff write down the location of the Tourist Police station, in Thai for the taxi, for me to go there tomorrow and file a report.

 

It's also a good thing I didn't take the "syringe" to a lab for DNA testing.

[OMB]

She was legitimately being nice.

 

She's a very sensual lady and that's why I've been keeping in touch with her for nearly two years.

 

When left my room, I checked the trash and noticed the condom, with semen, was in the trash.

I'd meet her for a coffee and put the sperminator on the table and have a good old laugh over it, with her.

[6853395]

the sperminator

 

That should be my new username.

 

Sperminator - terminating sperm by turning the condom inside out, and rinsing it with hot water.

[sabato]

hilarious lol, imagining the response from tourist police as you hand over the evidence hahaha

[Scumbag]

lol..the first thing that came into my head when I found the thread was 'paranoia'...

 

I suspect that this has probably happened to someone but I think it is extremely rare.

[themehta]

we must learn from our owned mistakes 555!

[Skalliwag]

Fuck,I found this in my bathroom.

Think wifey is trying to have another kid?

[sabato]

Fuck,I found this in my bathroom.

Think wifey is trying to have another kid?

I'm trying to figure out how it pumps water, has got me stumped

[Skalliwag]

I'm trying to figure out how it pumps water, has got me stumped

The.most obvious answer to me would be "Skalli,I think that thing is used to get rid of kids."

[Syd Tybil]

Thai ladies are inseminating themselves with toilet paper holders? Nefarious! [emoji12]

 

Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

[earicome]

With all respect OP it does seem you are the inspector clouseau of mongering

 

[Craigo81]

This is the funniest thing I have read on here!! Wetting myself!!

 

On a serious note though, always practice safe sex, finish on her face!!!

[user305]

OP needs a youtube channel where he takes everyday events and devices and somehow manages to turn them into wild eyed but vaguely plausible conspiracies.

[6853395]

By the way, this fiasco occurred in Bangkok, not Pattaya.

 

With all respect OP it does seem you are the inspector clouseau of mongering

 

 

[HEADING2LOS]

Still laughing reading this.... Funny and honest post. Glad you figured it out in time.

 

Sent from my SM-G935U using Tapatalk

[ricktoronto]

This is precisely why I try to avoid using condoms. You just can't rely on people taking responsibility for their own actions any more.

I use the Ronco Condom-Shred-O-Matic

[youngpattayaaddict]

I laughed my head off reading this,hilarious555

[Scuba+]

Paranoia, but funny. Was going to say, just shoot your load up there to avoid all that trouble

[seal]

555.....best you stay off the six..

 

those are some condom grabbers down there for sure.