Experiences Of Speaking Thai With Bar Girls

[Dr.Winston]

You will often hear Thailand ex-pats or old hands say "BG's don't like it when you speak Thai with them" The implication is that if you speak Thai with them that they will automatically put you into the Farang Ruu Maak" (Farang who knows too much) category. This does happen, I have heard farang ruu maak said many times in bars and Go Go's. The thing is that in my experience the girls who might be put off by this are usually the ones that you would want to avoid anyway. If they only want a farang who knows a little then what does that tell you about their intentions?

 

One group of BG's that love it when you can speak Thai are the Farm fresh new girls. They must feel very intimidated in their new environment. All those scary foreigners around that they cannot communicate with. Can you imagine what a relief it must be to them to find a foreigner that they can actually sit down and talk to? Mamasans will often bring the newest girls over to good foreigners that can speak Thai. I have been many BG's first customer for this reason.

 

On a deeper level I feel that you can bypass many of the barriers and defenses that they build up by speaking Thai with them. Over a period of time BG's will get used to the type of conversations that they have with customers (nearly alway in English). Their responses to the most common questions can become almost automatic. How many times do you think that they here "where are you from?" Many BG's are wary of becoming too attached to customers, they have learned that it causes a lot of heart break for them. Over time they build up defenses and responses to prevent this from happening. I have found that many of these defenses are bypassed when your Thai is good enough. Almost like you are approaching them from an angle that they are not used to defending against.

 

I have often had them stare at me and say "please stop" it's not because they are not enjoying the interaction (you can tell if a girl really likes you) it's because they can feel themselves being drawn in because you have bypassed their defenses with a level of communication that they just aren't used to from customers.

 

I also find that I tend to be viewed by them as an "insider" in their worlds. They will include me in their conversations and ask my advice on things.

 

Please do not be put off by those that would discourage you from learning to speak Thai. Once your Thai reaches a certain level the benefits will be worth the effort you have put into learning it.

[Nana Fly]

How long did it take before your level of Thai language was reasonable enough to hold a conversation in Thai with a BG.

 

I ask because I've been listening to the Thai Pimsleur recordings on the way to & from work, about an hour a day & I still find it difficult. Granted I've been doing it for about 3 months now but at this rate it's gonna take years.

 

Thanks

 

[Dr.Winston]

How long did it take before your level of Thai language was reasonable enough to hold a conversation in Thai with a BG.

 

I ask because I've been listening to the Thai Pimsleur recordings on the way to & from work, about an hour a day & I still find it difficult. Granted I've been doing it for about 3 months now but at this rate it's gonna take years.

 

Thanks

 

 

For me there was a period that lasted a couple of years (In which I was living in LOS) where it seemed that the more I learned the more I realised I didn't know. After two years it all seemed to just slip into place, li9ke a fog lifting.

[7-Eleven]

Dr

 

Many thanks for this post. It's posts like this that inspire me to learn thai more and more, I was told the other day to stop speaking Thai.

 

I look forward to the day were I can sit down for a meal with a red hot thai girl and connect in the same way as when I am speaking English to a fellow fluent English speaker.

 

Bring on September bud!

[Dr.Winston]

Dr

 

Many thanks for this post. It's posts like this that inspire me to learn thai more and more, I was told the other day to stop speaking Thai.

I look forward to the day were I can sit down for a meal with a red hot thai girl and connect in the same way as when I am speaking English to a fellow fluent English speaker.

 

Bring on September bud!

 

Just push through it mate. Sure, if their English is better than your Thai you might come off as a bit of a "try hard" by speaking Thai but it is the only way to learn really. Yes, roll on September.

Edited July 2, 2008 by Dr.Winston O'Boogie

[sonic692]

Khop khun mahk krap!! Dr.W.O.B

 

A short and true thread,thanks alot. I must say that I have noticed many a time when I've spoken Thai, the bg's dislike it.I was told, some think you're a clever c**t because you can speak their language. I just humour them most of the time! Cheers

[Millard]

The insight you provide on this board is invaluable. I'd love to see more of these types of posts.

 

In the meantime, I'll work on my Thai. I myself get tired of trading the standard, "where do you come from, how old are you?" etc.

Edited March 1, 2009 by Millard

[lbfmlover]

A very good topic, i only speak very limited thai but have found most of the more hardcore Bg especially in pattaya dont like when i speak a little thai. They are always trying to work out how much i can understand and never really help me even when i ask. Most of the ladys i have met in Phuket and some of the smaller islands have seemed really pleased that i know some thai and are always trying to teach me more.

I think it can only be a help afterall you can always speak english to them if you think they would be happier if you knew no thai.

[Dr.Winston]

The insight you provide on this board is invaluable. I'd love to see more of these types of posts.

 

In the meantime, I'll work on my Thai. I myself get tired of trading the standard, "where do you come from, how old are you?" etc. Fortunately, learning Thai has been a bit easier for me since I speak Chinese and there are similarities between the two. With some words, they're identical.

 

Thanks for your comments. I think you will find that speaking Chinese will indeed help you to learn Thai because you have already grasped the concept of a tonal language. I spent a few months in Taiwan 15 years ago and found that my Thai was helping me to learn Mandarin even though they are distinct from each other.

[Dr.Winston]

A very good topic, i only speak very limited thai but have found most of the more hardcore Bg especially in pattaya dont like when i speak a little thai. They are always trying to work out how much i can understand and never really help me even when i ask. Most of the ladys i have met in phuket and some of the smaller islands have seemed really pleased that i know some thai and are always trying to teach me more.

I think it can only be a help afterall you can always speak english to them if you think they would be happier if you knew no thai.

 

Yes, I think that speaking a little Thai does quite often annoy the BG's. The change in attitude comes when your Thai is better than their English (or whatever language you use). Probably because once it reaches this stage you are actually improving the level of communication between the two of you by speaking Thai with them as opposed to just showing off or using them for language practice.

 

Please don't think that by writing that I think it is wrong to practice basic Thai with them. Most of them will be fine with this. I am just referring to the ones who say that they don't like it.

[Dr.Winston]

Khop khun mahk krap!! Dr.W.O.B

 

A short and true thread,thanks alot. I must say that I have noticed many a time when I've spoken Thai, the bg's dislike it.I was told, some think you're a clever c**t because you can speak their language. I just humour them most of the time! Cheers

 

I think that quite often this "BG's don't like you speaking Thai" is a defensive response from people used to justify the fact that they have not or cannot be bothered to put in the effort to learn Thai to a good enough standard to improve their communication with Thais.

[Mr.DreamTransport]

One thing thats worth doing a few times once you get somewhat fluent I imagine. Go into a bar, and I have seen a friend who lives in Patts and speaks fluent Thai, telling a girl he was on vacation, first time to Thailand. The girl was all flirty with him, and once she started speaking some Thai to another girl, he started talking in Thai to her, she was a bit surprised and ended up telling him he wasn't a tourist. She ended up having a good laugh though as did we all.

[Gobby]

yeah man.. i dont even go there anymore.. its just better to act dumb..5555

 

but you are right about the farm fresh ones.. they are more comfy with you if you speak thai "better" then most farangs..lol

-----

 

as thai language is very polite normally imo.. i find it very hard to say " can i fuck/stuff you in the ass / ot toot ter dai mai..lol " in thai...and keep a straight face.. maybe its just me but i dont think thats very polite....

 

but in english i can say what ever i want and there no shame about it.... .. after all ( stupid farang no pom pum )55555

Edited July 3, 2008 by PE.GOB

[Dr.Winston]

One thing thats worth doing a few times once you get somewhat fluent I imagine. Go into a bar, and I have seen a friend who lives in Patts and speaks fluent Thai, telling a girl he was on vacation, first time to Thailand. The girl was all flirty with him, and once she started speaking some Thai to another girl, he started talking in Thai to her, she was a bit surprised and ended up telling him he wasn't a tourist. She ended up having a good laugh though as did we all.

 

I can see why your friend doesn't just steam in with the Thai if he is fluent. I too don't usually speak Thai with them until I feel that they are comfortable with me (Unless they can't speak English). As I mentioned earlier in this thread they can be really shocked when your Thai is fluent. I find that once they are used to you and decided that they like you they will see your Thai as a big bonus.

 

There are lots of games you can play with the girls. Personally if they ask me if I speak it I do not lie to them although I will often refuse to speak it for a while. Once you say that you speak Thai they will not leave you alone until they hear you speak it. You can just keep stringing them along for a drink or two.

 

I also find that they are often willing to give me the low down on other girls in their bars(after promising confidentiality of course). I.E. which ones have Thai boyfriends, which ones do lesbian etc. which ones do Yaba, which can be very useful.

[Dr.Winston]

yeah man.. i dont even go there anymore.. its just better to act dumb..5555

 

but you are right about the farm fresh ones.. they are more comfy with you if you speak thai "better" then most farangs..lol

-----

 

as thai language is very polite normally imo.. i find it very hard to say " can i fuck/stuff you in the ass / ot toot ter dai mai..lol " in thai...and keep a straight face.. maybe its just me but i dont think thats very polite....

 

but in english i can say what ever i want and there no shame about it.... .. after all ( stupid farang no pom pum )55555

 

I know what you mean. It's almost as if you are communicating with them on a more personal level. I find that the girls often take on a different persona while you are speaking Thai to them. They have the act that they put on for the punters, when they are usually speaking English and the real them. I often get the feeling that they feel more more vulnerable when I am speaking Thai with them because your conversation isn't going through the usual defensive filters.

 

You can still ask them personal questions although you do feel a bit more exposed not having a language barrier to hide behind. I guess that many long term mongerers develop a "bar persona" as well.

[buttmint]

good thread here.....good insights!

[blackscull]

great thread DR WO. I always try and learn a bit everytime im in los. as said before some like it some dont.

 

have to say it helps a lot when on hols in any country if u know a bit of there language

[Merangue]

My main problem in learning what little Thai i have so far (Pimsluer etc) is when i try to speak to my GF and she sometimes comes back at me with Lao phrasing. Interesting as it is, it can get damned confusing effectively not knowing what language you are actually learning at any given moment.

 

Happily with my trusty dictionary in hand and her slightly better (vastly improved) English skills we can now communicate far better than we once could.

 

Not all Thai's from bars prefer you not to learn. We are each learning small amounts over a long period and almost developing our own mixed Thainglish language. Only problem is she is better and quicker at learning than i am cos i have always been crap at languages.

 

Its hard over the phone but you can make surprising progress even so.

[caltexman]

Talking over the phone to your thai girl is the hardest,most frustrating thing you can do ...........lol.

[El Jesus]

I have a question, has anyone used Rosetta Stone to learn, because I was thinking about getting it.

[Dr.Winston]

I have a question, has anyone used Rosetta Stone to learn, because I was thinking about getting it.

 

In all honesty it would not be my preferred course. If you read the thread in the learning Thai section I'm sure that there are some comments about it in there. I would say go for the Pimsleur course which might even be available for download somewhere on this board.

[Dr.Winston]

My main problem in learning what little Thai i have so far (Pimsluer etc) is when i try to speak to my GF and she sometimes comes back at me with Lao phrasing. Interesting as it is, it can get damned confusing effectively not knowing what language you are actually learning at any given moment.

 

Happily with my trusty dictionary in hand and her slightly better (vastly improved) English skills we can now communicate far better than we once could.

 

Not all Thai's from bars prefer you not to learn. We are each learning small amounts over a long period and almost developing our own mixed Thainglish language. Only problem is she is better and quicker at learning than i am cos i have always been crap at languages.

 

Its hard over the phone but you can make surprising progress even so.

 

I can see the problem with her coming back to you with Lao phrases. I learned most of my Thai in England and I'm quite glad for it. I think it made me learn to walk before I ran and it meant that I wasn't distracted by dialects etc. I guess the most important thing is to pay more attention to the Thai in courses and dictionaries than the Thai that people you meet speak.

 

It's easy to learn to understand the dialects once your central Thai is good.

[Merangue]

I can see the problem with her coming back to you with Lao phrases. I learned most of my Thai in England and I'm quite glad for it. I think it made me learn to walk before I ran and it meant that I wasn't distracted by dialects etc. I guess the most important thing is to pay more attention to the Thai in courses and dictionaries than the Thai that people you meet speak.

 

It's easy to learn to understand the dialects once your central Thai is good.

 

 

If there were anywhere even remotely local for me to go to for lessons i would go there straight away. Unfortunately there are no Thai language teachers or lessons within a very large distance of my home that i can find. Hence my reliance on the likes of Pimsluer ( not all that great for speaking to BG's from Isaan) and any other online resources.

 

I can honestly say i have learned as much from my Dictionary and the website

 

http://www.thai2english.com/

 

Talking to the girlfriend with those two and my pathetic Thai abilities and i can get by, mostly due to her increasing ability to understand my Scouse English. I make a note of any Lao phrases that she comes out with but i try not to take them in right now hehe. Needless to say there is nothing available for learning Lao from Pimsluer yet.

 

Incidentally, with judicious use of Copy and Paste, i can send Texts in Thai script and translate them (roughly) if i receive any by using the tools available on the Thai2English website. It is an excellent freebie site.

 

The Lao lessons are i suspect, largely due to her wanting me to be able to talk directly with her elderly father for a few phrases.

[Dr.Winston]

If there were anywhere even remotely local for me to go to for lessons i would go there straight away. Unfortunately there are no Thai language teachers or lessons within a very large distance of my home that i can find. Hence my reliance on the likes of Pimsluer ( not all that great for speaking to BG's from Isaan) and any other online resources.

 

I can honestly say i have learned as much from my Dictionary and the website

 

http://www.thai2english.com/

 

Talking to the girlfriend with those two and my pathetic Thai abilities and i can get by, mostly due to her increasing ability to understand my Scouse English. I make a note of any Lao phrases that she comes out with but i try not to take them in right now hehe. Needless to say there is nothing available for learning Lao from Pimsluer yet.

 

Incidentally, with judicious use of Copy and Paste, i can send Texts in Thai script and translate them (roughly) if i receive any by using the tools available on the Thai2English website. It is an excellent freebie site.

 

The Lao lessons are i suspect, largely due to her wanting me to be able to talk directly with her elderly father for a few phrases.

 

I think you have the right attitude. You are making use of all the resources you have at hand. Although those websites have their uses there is no substitute to learning Thai from a proper course IMO.

 

I can't see anything wrong with courses that consist of books and Cd's. It's just an individual choice as to which method of learning you prefer. When I was first learning I would do a lesson on my course and then pay a friends Thai wife to go through it with me afterwords. if you don't know any Thais then just stick to the courses or advertise for any Thais in the area willing to go through it with you

[Scottish_Tyrant]

Well said Doc

 

I speak very little Thai but enough to get a point over if I have the words LOL.

 

I have heard farang ruu mak and always wondered what it meant!!! I asked by GF but never said it correctly either that or she dont want to get me pissed off!

 

Most people find Thai very hard to learn as its a completely alien language to westerners, like learning Chinese etc. Different sounds, different alphabet etc. Just back from netherlands. Never lived there until last month, I was there for 4 weeks, its amazing how quickly you can pick up other european languages and how slow and difficult Thai is.

 

I must make more of an effort. I try and learn something new every few days on: http://www.thai-language.com/but even thats far from perfect. I say something to my GF when on the phone and there is silence, followed by ... U f*ckin bin ba, whot u try speak ....

 

Here guys next time your on the phone to your teelac try, soot teelac You should get a puking sound with pagwan followed there after I am sure the Doc will advise my I think instead of just darling, it means my darling but in a very loving way?

 

Good thread Doc