Vasectomy Follow-Up

[Tamada]

I finally got a vasectomy a couple of months ago at Bangkok Hospital Pattaya and this morning went in for my post-vasectomy follow-up appointment. That's the one where they do a "semen analysis" to see if any sperm cells can be found in a fresh sample of your semen.

 

I didn't know what exactly to expect (since a semen sample will require ejaculating and ejaculating requires quite a bit of sexual stimulation and arousal). This being Thailand, I was hopeful that they had some lovelies to assist you in getting off, of course, but that wasn't to be the case.

 

I was clueless and let a lovely lady in the urology clinic give me direction. She first provided me with a plastic cup with a secure top on it, which I estimated might have been two inches high and not much less in diameter. For a guy my age, it would take me at least a year to fill it to the brim.

 

Then another young lovely escorted me to the "Reproductive Procedure Rooms" (that's what the actual sign over the door calls them). These looked not unlike the upstairs rooms at Lolita's (except that they were a little bigger, had a bathroom attached to each room and sadly did NOT have a skilled Lolita's girl in the room to assist). There was a leather couch (quite a nice one) and a flat screen TV on the wall, with a DVD machine hooked up to it. The young lovely smiled gracefully and handed me the remote for the DVD machine. She then politely took her leave, so I was on my own.

 

That was the "motivational" aspect ... they had a sex tape that you could watch for stimulative purposes. As such material goes, this one was really tame (and almost seemed to be something to appeal to women who were trying to spice up their sex lives a bit). So it was surprisingly difficult to create a reaction at all.

 

They finally got to the good stuff (off come her panties) and I was astounded ... they had masked her crotch (or whatever you call it when there's a digital mosaic to obscure the private parts ... early Japanese porn used to do that a lot)! Huh? They're going to show you her crotch (to assist in your arousal so that you can provide the needed specimen) but then they blur it out (so that you don't get aroused, as that might be considered to be perverted)? Go figure!

 

At that point I figure I'm not going to be able to deliver, but I catch a lucky break ... the mosaic covers her crotch but not her anus (I have no idea on the logic for treating them differently, as early Japanese porn used to blur both areas). Fortunately for me, though, I'm a butt man but even so I was barely able to cum finally.

 

Now I'm curious about policies and procedures there ... I'm wondering if they'd let you bring your "wife" (or your "wife du jour") in to help you over the stimulation hump? If I ever have to take that test again, I think that's what I'm going to try to do.

Edited July 15, 2011 by Tamada