Any of you gents have this problem? I’m 44 and have no problems getting it up, but sometimes having a problem finishing which is frustrating as hell

 

Not sure if it’s a mental thing or just being hungover the next day and dehydrated 

 

I should add I don’t even bother having sex when drinking, this is happening the day after

 

one frustrated farang here

 

cheers guys

6 minutes ago, Jas2T said:

Any of you gents have this problem? I’m 44 and have no problems getting it up, but sometimes having a problem finishing which is frustrating as hell

 

Not sure if it’s a mental thing or just being hungover the next day and dehydrated 

 

I should add I don’t even bother having sex when drinking, this is happening the day after

 

one frustrated farang here

 

cheers guys

Do you use any ED medication, as it can make it harder to cum?

Maybe you have sex too often, as you get older you might need a longer recovery time between every session to keep the libido up!

 

I'm 33, and I've dealt with this issue for a long time. I think I might have slightly less sensitivity than most guys, or maybe it's because I’ve gotten used to touching myself a certain way. Either way, it usually takes me longer than average to finish, and sometimes I don’t finish at all.

That said, it doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy sex. I still do, and I really focus on making sure my partner is enjoying herself. In fact, when a woman is really into it, when she’s turned on and playful, that turns me on more and makes it easier for me to finish. On the flip side, if the chemistry isn’t quite there, I sometimes struggle to keep an erection. That’s become more of a thing in the last few years, so I’ve started taking pills to help with it.

It doesn’t really bother me personally, but sometimes I can tell it affects my partner, like she thinks it’s her fault or that I’m not attracted to her. I try to be open about it, so she knows it’s not about her.

Thanks guys it nice to know I’m not alone, I do use Cialis so maybe that is making it harder to cum 

 

And @Alex92 I’ve also dealt with it for a long time. It’s not the end of the world but it just feels like the job isn’t complete lol which I find frustrating. I guess it isn’t as bad as not getting it up at all

 

and @plahgat I think you might be right as in having a bit more recovery rather than every day. I was fine the first day here but the next day it just didn’t happen

I haven’t tried Cialis before, but some of my friends say it works better, so I’m planning to give it a shot next time. I usually go with Kamagra gels - they do the job, but I’ve noticed they can dull the sensation quite a bit. And if I’ve had a little too much to drink on top of that, it can start to feel kind of numb, almost like I’m not really feeling much at all, like I’m going through the motions.

8 minutes ago, FarangBear said:

Finding the right condom is also critical. Sometimes variation can also be good here as different types can give different sensations. Last trip the Skyn Large was my favorite, but I alternated it with MySize. Wanting to try the hex condoms next time as I heard these are very good.

Oh yeah, condoms are a death sentence for my erection usually. I almost always go bareback unless I don't trust the girl for some reason.

Are these Skyn condoms much different from normal ones? Ive heard good things about them before

1 minute ago, Alex92 said:

Oh yeah, condoms are a death sentence for my erection usually. I almost always go bareback unless I don't trust the girl for some reason.

Are these Skyn condoms much different from normal ones? Ive heard good things about them before

Yes, Skyn is made of SKYNFEEL which is a polyisoprene material. It transfers heat better than latex and give a more natural feeling. They are also much thinner than normal condoms. The Skyn Elite is even thinner and I see they now have a large version of that too which they didn't before.

But ofc nothing compares 100% to going natural.

30 minutes ago, Jas2T said:

I’ve also dealt with it for a long time. It’s not the end of the world but it just feels like the job isn’t complete lol which I find frustrating. I guess it isn’t as bad as not getting it up at all

I'm also having to rely on Cialis most of the time which does not help with finishing. Additionally I am not very sensitive down there anymore like I used to be. Girls giving me a BJ, need to be special to trigger me.

But I have learned that it is not all about me finishing. I absolutely get a mental orgasm out of seeing a girl enjoy herself and coming. That is job completed for me. So many times where I simply faked having one myself, because it took too long and I didn't want negative discussions or feelings.

So many times where I have to contemplate bareback if I want to come the old fashioned way.

Edited July 23, 20251 yr by LazyLus

As long as you get the lady to orgasm, no worries, it is all about her pleasure not yours.  5555  hahha

Not sure what else to say, but if you cannot, at least get some satisfaction by getting her off is my only answer. 

I am not a doctor or psychologist ...wish you well, you have decades more fun to come 

Edited July 23, 20251 yr by LovinBgood

I have the solution for this - go get a massage. It works wonders. 

1 minute ago, LovinBgood said:

As long as you get the lady to orgasm, no worries, it is all about her pleasure not yours.  5555  hahha

I kind of live by this as I get very much turned on myself by a girl having an orgasm. The down fall is that the pussy is getting much more relaxed after an orgasm so it can feel less tight if she didn't learnt how to use her pelvic muscles during intercourse. 

yep, same for me here. there is nothing more beautiful in this world as a woman in ecstasy

Thanks guys all these replies has really made me feel better and taken some pressure off so many thanks for that

funny this was shortly after my post I had a girl come over, I was struggling again and while having a 5 min break I read these comments, and decided to focus on pleasuring her. I got over the line in the end and you guys were right, it was her pleasure getting me off and make me finish 

I’ll lay off for a few days now to recharge as I definitely think this is a factor 

39 minutes ago, Jas2T said:

I’ll lay off for a few days now to recharge as I definitely think this is a factor 

Sometimes, you can be your own worst enemy/critic

Recharge and enjoy doing other things to have fun

I am a prostate cancer survivor (so far anyway) and struggle greatly with finishing, and I'm dry as well. On top of that the ED is so bad only tri-mix works for me, so even if I finish, I have a 2-3 hour erection.

The younger girls just don't have enough experience to deal with all that, and are also much more disappointed/discouraged when they can't get it done. I recommend very experienced girls 25 or older. They have seen it all, nothing fazes them, and have the capabilities of true professionals.

One of them got me 100% of the time, she is therefor a regular. Her trick is to save the best for last, reverse cow-girl with her hands on my balls. You may get more success keeping the boys involved!

I've had issues with this on and off over the years. 

Just general fitness helps. And not wacking off all the time, not being too used to one thing.

But also, I just stopped trying to force it. At about the 20 minute mark, maybe earlier, I start getting tired, and I know it's not going to happen, or be a desperate struggle to make it happen if it's going to, and I just stop. First couple times, girls thought it was kinda strange, but as I did it more and more, I guess I got more casual with the idea and it was less and less of an issue with them (always different girls) or maybe I just started looking older and fitting that old man narrative better?

I think I'm pretty normal with everyone else starting with a little foreplay and such, start penetrating, switch positions a few times. etc... Thing is, I can keep going until I get tired, and then I can't finish. If, at say the 10 or 15 minute mark, I decide it's time to get things done, find a position that I'm gonna get the right tempo set and finish, I typically can without a problem. It I play around too much, take my time exploring and enjoying my partner, and it starts to get tired (or more sore, really), it's best to just stop and take a break. 

Sometimes, she's happy enough to also have a little break and cuddle up and rest, even a quick nap, and then just start over with determined charge for that goal and no playing around on the way. I think one little bird on Soi 6 seemed almost shocked, after going at it for 20/30 minutes we stopped to cuddle up and both fell asleep for 10/15 minutes, I woke up, rolled her over and focused on the goal and was done inside of probably 3 or 4 minutes.

Other times, especially in Pattaya, I just stop, tell her I can't, clean up, head downstairs, next door, another drink, another girl, start over.  I think my personal best on that was 4 girls before I decided it was time to finally just finish with one and go home.

Thanks for all the comments and experiences guys, they have all helped in some way and I can’t thank you all enough. Sorry I haven’t individually replied but there is a lot of info here

 

To update I took a few days off which helped, today I was about to finish then the devil in my head took over. I guess I released too much precum at that point and then it was just to wet to get any stimulation. I explained it to the girl and she offered to go clean to fix the problem, went at it again and boom no problem. Never knew a girl would be so understanding! 
 

hopefully that helps someone in the future if they experience that

thanks guys

have the girl suck or bite your nipples and slip a finger up your ass or whatever else it takes u to get off

Find something else to do and just fuck less.  Saves money and you will enjoy it more if doing it less.  If you can't finish then that means you are trying to force it.

Edited July 26, 20251 yr by Kale

I just started with Sex (in Pattaya) again since 19 years and I think for me it's definitly the porn overconsumption over the years. Probably also low T. I don't get really exited unless the girl is super hot. The first girl I couldnt finish at all. The second only with my hand. And the third I was trying to come very quickly to get it over with. Embarassing, but there I said it.

On 26/07/2025 at 21:02, shadscat said:

have the girl suck or bite your nipples and slip a finger up your ass or whatever else it takes u to get off

This actually works. Had a girl suck and bite my nipple while doing her in missionary, that made me cum with a condom for the first time 

Very common issue and frustrating. For me, it’s largely in my head. I’ve been doing better lately as I know I can often get there with patience. I don’t have much to add that hasn’t been mentioned. Very low dose of meds helps if needed. I fantasize a lot, which I’m trying to get away from. 

Sometimes I get a swollen prostate which causes issues. Curious if others deal with this and have solutions. 

Death grip, Cialis, Condoms, Porn. All things that can slow us down.

The shape and size of the woman's vagina may have a really big impact. I find the way a woman moves and her voice make a big difference for me.

I used to cum in minutes when I was younger (sometimes quite embarrassing). Once I hired a girl in Prague and she called me "American Express" after two minutes of pure pleasure, haha. Then I worked at lasting longer, just wanting to enjoy it.

At lot of it may be in my head. When I develop a deeper bond with a woman it's easier for me to cum. Not the kind of thing to say on a mongering forum. 

Last year I tried a Viagra / Cialis combo and it was making it really difficult to get to the finish line. I sure could pound hard for hours though and my girlfriend really liked it. Eventually I didn't need it with her and seems like the finish was easier to achieve. I don't know. It's all kind of a mystery.

At one point, I fell into a bad “feedback loop” where I would try to last as long as I can but that in turn made me less sensitive so when I wanted to finish I couldn’t, or worse didn’t have the stamina to finish. Getting into better shape helped the latter problem but sometimes I have to just use my hand as a sad consolation prize.

4 hours ago, j9chang said:

Death grip, Cialis, Condoms, Porn.

Mongering.

Unlimited girls.

Quantity over quality.

Too much sex when compared to the average. 

It is why mongers have bucket lists and have the most bizarre, weird and unique items on the list.

I actually would trade this for premature ejaculation any day of the week.