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Ireland suffers worst ever air disaster


Gator001

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Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery.

 

 

 

 

Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.

Better to be daring and cool, than timid and uncool! Life's journey is not about arriving at your gravesite in a well preserved condition, but rather dropping into it in a long sideways skid, totally worn out, and shouting "Holy Shit...What a ride" - Indian Larry

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WTF. better keep the day job.555

G.O.M.

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Just stole this from another forum (apologies to poster)

 

IRISH SAUSAGES

 

Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro.

 

Murphy said 'Hang on, I have an idea.'

 

He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.

 

Shamus said 'Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money at all!'

 

Murphy replied, 'Don't worry - just follow me.'

 

He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints

of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson whisky.

 

Shamus said 'Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money!!'

 

Murphy replied, with a smile. 'Don't worry, I have a plan , Cheers! '

 

They downed their Drinks. Murphy said, 'OK, I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth.'

 

The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.

 

They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free.

 

At the tenth pub Shamus said 'Murphy - I don't think I can do any more of this. I'm drunk and me knees are killing me!' </ B>

 

Murphy said, 'How do you think I feel? I can't even remember which pub I lost the sausage in

Better to be daring and cool, than timid and uncool! Life's journey is not about arriving at your gravesite in a well preserved condition, but rather dropping into it in a long sideways skid, totally worn out, and shouting "Holy Shit...What a ride" - Indian Larry

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