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chris2004

Turning down free sex !!

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chris2004

I met a nice lady a few weeks ago and have seen her several times. We get on well and the sex was good too. She never asked for money and i just paid for drinks/meals etc. I thought this would continue and maybe turn into something serious. BTW i am quite old, nearly double her age.  Anyway this week she mentions on text that her income at work has come down, now half what it used to be. This immediately raised the red flags with me and i thought a request for money would soon follow. I responded by saying maybe i could pay her but that turned into an argument where she said i was insulting her. Now if she was genuine i can imagine that would be an insult but i have been caught before by "free" sex shortly followed by demands for money.  I guess i have just got used to P4P in Pattaya.

Anyway i guess that's the end of the "relationship" and my "free" sex. Was i being too cynical or just wary of another possible scam.

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Crash6969


If she is not in the P4P biz, then yes, your offer to pay for sex would be insulting.

Perhaps she was just looking for some empathy from you.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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Fuzzfrog

Sex is never free, if you don’t pay with money you end up paying some other way.

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keepitfun

So don’t pay her. Simples

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chris2004
Posted (edited)
2 minutes ago, Fuzzfrog said:

Sex is never free, if you don’t pay with money you end up paying some other way. 

That was my thought. Better to pay a known price than get hit with a demand later on.

Edited by chris2004

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secret tom
1 hour ago, chris2004 said:

I met a nice lady a few weeks ago and have seen her several times. We get on well and the sex was good too. She never asked for money and i just paid for drinks/meals etc. I thought this would continue and maybe turn into something serious. BTW i am quite old, nearly double her age.  Anyway this week she mentions on text that her income at work has come down, now half what it used to be. This immediately raised the red flags with me and i thought a request for money would soon follow. I responded by saying maybe i could pay her but that turned into an argument where she said i was insulting her. Now if she was genuine i can imagine that would be an insult but i have been caught before by "free" sex shortly followed by demands for money.  I guess i have just got used to P4P in Pattaya.

Anyway i guess that's the end of the "relationship" and my "free" sex. Was i being too cynical or just wary of another possible scam.

no free lunch in this world,,pay for play on the day..no drama

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Scuba+

She was probably just playing the long game, relationship, marriage, house etc.

Most want money somehow sometime

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LeoTex

Could of just offered a small loan to get through her cash flow problem, telling her she could pay it back when she can.

Of course we know that it would never be paid back.

Would have saved "lose of face with her" and not insult her on being paid for sex.

LeoTex

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rob63

The problem you have,, is that you will never know, unless of course she starts accepting money.

That's the problem of being a farang in Asia. The fake ones look, talk and act exactly like the real ones. And it's the fake ones that actually seek you out.

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LOTTELLEE WINNA
2 hours ago, LeoTex said:

Could of just offered a small loan to get through her cash flow problem, telling her she could pay it back when she can.

Of course we know that it would never be paid back.

Would have saved "lose of face with her" and not insult her on being paid for sex.

LeoTex

Yes, the loss of face is the issue. Never underestimate how important this is in LoS.

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Patts Luver

Well, Thai girls are not all the same. Some are p4p, some aren't, but have it as a side jobb if the need of money is big. Some go with farangs just like a boyfriend...With that said, most of all girls are poor and of course they'd like to have some extra for a bit confortable life.

An other factor is the culture. Thailand is a traditional country, where the man is the provider. Thailand is not Sweden....

So the fact that your woman has reacted that way means she probably thinks of you rather like a bf than a customer. She needs some empathy, some support...

If I were you I'd give her some money without letting her feel that I'm paying for the services...She'll be happy and as I like her and want to keep that relationship, I'm sure I'll be happy. This is just my opinion....

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vimto66

I`ve never turned down free sex in Thailand.... than again i`ve never been offered it.

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Kaiboom
5 hours ago, Crash6969 said:


If she is not in the P4P biz, then yes, your offer to pay for sex would be insulting.

Perhaps she was just looking for some empathy from you.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yes. And why would you phrase it as money for sex? You could have just "lended" (not expecting it back) it to her or bought her something she actually needs. Saying it's sex for money makes her a prostitute, and if she isn't, she is bound to be highly offended that you think she is. 

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Shaygate
Posted (edited)

You slipped up offering her money for sex, if you had suggested you help her out, offered a gift, a loan (with no expectation of repayment), money for taxi etc..... she could have saved face while accepting it, i think you might have blown it now 

Edited by Shaygate
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Dalef65
6 hours ago, chris2004 said:

Anyway i guess that's the end of the "relationship" and my "free" sex. Was i being too cynical or just wary of another possible scam.

 

There was no scam. Your mistake was asking her if you can pay her for sex and initiating a discussion about the price......,

I agree with the other guys. You should have just found a way to give her some money without making it look you think she is a prostitute

Then everybody would have been happy.

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rob63

As the resident cheap Charlie, i shall disagree with the others.

You should have empathized with her, and asked her to visit you for consolation. If the lady hinted she needed money, you should have blissfully ignored those issues and told her to look on the bright side of life. :)

She survived before you. She will survive after you.

No fights. No problem.

 

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duffMaster
Posted (edited)

If you are out with a western lady and she tells you that she has money problems... would you answer be, “ can I pay you for sex “.?.. .... and there is the problem, never assume girls you meet outside the the p4p scene are hookers. Just offer to help her on the side just as you would do with a western girlfriend.. if that is what you want to do. Of course

Edited by duffMaster

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Somchai1

Did you enquire what circumstances had led to the her salary being halved? What line of work does she do? Trying to illicit more detail might lead to a more clearer picture about her mindset

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bob_ny

Why would you get into a fight over paying her or not?

if you brought it up and then rebuked, did you press on and insist that you pay her?

the correct response to her sharing to you about her drop in salary would be something like, “how can I help?” Or “can I help?”

And then after she turned you down the right response would be something like, “I’m sorry, please forgive me. I just want to help and don’t like seeing you hurt”

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Daz Manc
15 hours ago, chris2004 said:

i have been caught before by "free" sex shortly followed by demands for money.  I guess i have just got used to P4P in Pattaya.

This  !!!

Your original assumption is absolutely 100% correct

She is playing the Long Game

 

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chris2004
5 hours ago, Somchai1 said:

Did you enquire what circumstances had led to the her salary being halved? What line of work does she do? Trying to illicit more detail might lead to a more clearer picture about her mindset 

She works in a nail shop, just a drop in the number of customers.

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per anum

Regardless of her intentions, she seems like a nice girl......even if they refuse money, do buy them gifts and such as a form of face saving compensation. 

As you haven't given her shit, I suggest you reconcile ASAP and amend your wayward and freeloading ways! She seems like one of the good ones

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felix the cat

She was definitely setting you up for a big ''pay day'' so to speak. Even though you apparently ''insulted her'' by paying for sex,that's another way of her saying that she's not a prostitute BUT you will have to pay to be with her in the future...take care of her entire family! 

Ouch!!! :huh:

 

 

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PatsGuy

First of all her story is most likely, imo, not true about her work.  To me it sounds like an excuse to ask you for money.

Sure she is not p4p but she still wants something out of the relationship.  

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Jous
21 hours ago, vimto66 said:

I`ve never turned down free sex in Thailand.... than again i`ve never been offered it.

Thanks! Sometimes i’ve got the feeling of being the only simpleton who pays for sex in Pattaya :Fuck_Knows:

 

:Dance1:

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