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English Monk in Thailand....


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Sounds like fun but please don't invite Expatitude! (Did I spell that right?)

 

Don't worry Big Man has a plan for you just sit back and enjoy the journey!

I am totally enjoying my ride on the planet...  making the most of it!  the last year has been about creating emotional and financial space for the two women in my life here in the US, my ex (mother of my kids) and current (but not living together since June) wife...  they are all taken care of and happy with new men etc, mission accomplished...

 

just established with my current wife (today!) that we are no longer lovers, so even more space... AND, over the weekend broke it off with the tgf I was coming to see (the village trip!) due to the same old story repeated a million times on this forum (oh, the tangled webs they weave!)... glad to have done that, even more space, and all three women love me, and I love them!  the only one suffering may be the tg, but she will recover...  and is still my friend...

 

hence the new pic for my avatar...  butterfly on the loose!

 

will PM you once I know when I will be in town my friend...  cheers!

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Its strange how liberating it is once you realize you don't need all this clutter of attachment to hide behind.

 

Once you start clearing everything out you in theory have less but you actually make space to fill with new things.

 

As a Monk you have nothing but its then you realism just how little you really do need. The rest is just suffering due to attachment.

 

So you have completed your metamorphosis from grub to butterfly. Nice!

 

Look forward to hearing from you.

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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many people have faith and belief in things that cannot be proven.  why the insistence on everyone seeing things your way?  what is your point if not that?  do you have all the answers?  

 

I have never insisted anyone believe anything; I made no point--I *asked* what I believe to be a legitimate question. I really don't know the answer--you seem to believe that he believes these things by faith. I really want to know if he feels the same and how that jibes with the statement in his signature:

"Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true."

 

Perhaps he will say he takes it on faith. Perhaps he has experienced something that has confirmed his belief. Perhaps there are other things the Buddha has said that have proven to be true leading him to the conclusion that the reincarnation (or whatever you call it) part of the Buddha's story is true. That's why I asked the question; I wanted to know. By the way, it has been mentioned that there's some sort of queue of questions, and I'm in no big hurry.

 

I hope your life sorts itself out well, transitions can be a bitch but often lead to a happier time.

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I have never insisted anyone believe anything; I made no point--I *asked* what I believe to be a legitimate question. I really don't know the answer--you seem to believe that he believes these things by faith. I really want to know if he feels the same and how that jibes with the statement in his signature:

"Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true."

 

Perhaps he will say he takes it on faith. Perhaps he has experienced something that has confirmed his belief. Perhaps there are other things the Buddha has said that have proven to be true leading him to the conclusion that the reincarnation (or whatever you call it) part of the Buddha's story is true. That's why I asked the question; I wanted to know. By the way, it has been mentioned that there's some sort of queue of questions, and I'm in no big hurry.

 

I hope your life sorts itself out well, transitions can be a bitch but often lead to a happier time.

Wow, did not get anything but "civil" from this, sorry to be interpreting your input here in a negative way...

 

I am fine, everyone is happy around me, my loved ones are taken care of emotionally and financially, and I am free to roam the planet at will for the rest of my life... till another gal ties me up in knots anyway, hahaha!

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"The very purpose of religion is to control yourself, not to criticize others. Rather, we must criticize ourselves. How much am I doing about my anger? About my attachment, about my hatred, about my pride, my jealousy? These are the things which we must check in daily life."

 

~ H.H. The Dalai Lama

 

 

 

 

 

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"The very purpose of religion is to control yourself, not to criticize others. Rather, we must criticize ourselves. How much am I doing about my anger? About my attachment, about my hatred, about my pride, my jealousy? These are the things which we must check in daily life."

 

~ H.H. The Dalai Lama

 

Great quote thanks for sharing it.

 

Buddhism is all about going inside yourself to understand yourself first. Why do certain things make me angry? Why does an certain action cause pleasure? Its like when they say you have to love yourself before you can truly love another.

 

You don't have to be a Buddhist to meditate but all (good!) Buddhist will meditate. Meditation is incredibly difficult at first the concepts and goal is to 'think nothing' Oh right like that possible how can you think nothing? With so many years of constantly thinking its hard very, very hard but with practice and patients you are slowly able to control the amount of rubbish that goes through your head. Once you stop thinking about whats for dinner and what is on TV you find yourself actually dealing with the things you would rather choose to forget that are locked away in the deepest most secure place you have in your head. We all have them rooms and boy aint they ugly?

 

Unresolved problems/emotions will just keep dragged  down. Sure a bit of denial will let you get away with it most of the time but all the time you carry the negativity you are attached to it and hey you know what attachment causes.

 

If anyone has ever read Phra Farrang (if not why not go and read it immediately!) throughout the book Phra Peter openly discussed a good 80% of the events he came across while ordained. The biggest thing he never spoke about was whet happened while he meditated.

 

I can tell you now at the start you are solely focused on trying to stop your mind from wandering. Once you have a reasonable grasp of that strange things start to happen. You can have some sessions where you are full of light and happiness and others were all you do is cry. Been there. The emotions we all try and bury need to come out and be dealt with maybe through simple acceptance of something that happened. Maybe from understanding as you start to see things in a slightly different way But regardless they have to be faced. A bad memory is simply an emotion that we don't attach to. If we feel it rising then allow it to come, tough when you know its going to hurt but trying not to think about it only ends up in attachment with the emotion staying around longer than if you had just let it come and go in its own time.

 

Danca's new avatar is the perfect example of how I tell people to deal with it when this happens. Think of the emotion as a butterfly. You see it floating in towards you and it settles on your arm say. Don't try and hold it or push it away because I promise you will go when it is ready. Repeating this enough times with even the hardest things in your own personal world of pain mental room will slowly resolve them.

 

Why have I waffled on about all that? Simply because true Buddhism is inside you not around your neck as a 50M baht Amulet or as the huge golden Buddha statue you donated to the local temple that just BS show fake Buddhists. Learn to understand yourself which is odd saying to a group of people the age we are but is true. Once you are able to start facing down the daemons you carry you will fell so much lighter and some much more able to continue facing your fears. Constantly questioning yourself and actions we call being 'mindful' which forms the core of the the way to reduce personal suffering The Eight Fold Path.

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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A few quotes from Lord Buddha......

 

V66
Fools of little wit move about with the very self as their own foe, doing evil deeds the fruit of which is bitter.

V223
Conquer the angry man by love; conquer the ill-natured man by goodness; conquer the miser with generosity; conquer the liar with truth.

V228
There never was, there never will be, nor is there now to be found anyone who is wholly blamed or wholly praised.

V306
The liar goes to a woeful state, and also he who, having done (wrong), says, ``I did not.'' Both after death become equal, men of base actions in the other world.

V318
Those who see faults in the faultless, and perceive no wrong in that which is wrong, such men, due to their wrong views go to woeful states.
 

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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I see. Do you believe that the Buddha lived "500 different lives some as animal most as human"? And if you do, how did you come to that belief--keeping in mind what it says in your signature: "Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true."

 

Do I believe he lived 500+ lives some 2500 years ago? Using our conditioned Western way of 'if we cant see it then its not real' it would be impossible to accept. I have been in Thailand for over 10 years and have been blessed (and sometimes) scared to see things that simply have no explanation. I have absolute belief that something happens after we die I will put a post up from the other side when my time comes!

 

Its said that people that are able to achieve the deepest level of meditation called Janna are able to leave their bodies and see past lives and in some cases where they will be reborn in their next life. Problem is again out Western conditioning instantly takes this comment as rubbish. I have heard of Monks that are able to undergo major surgery without anesthetic because they detach themselves from their body while its happening.

 

The fact is regardless of religion or belief no one can say for certain what happens when you die. All I will ask you to think about is have you ever had a deja vu experience? Where could that of come from? Maybe a previous life when you went to the place you are at now? Have you ever felt drawn to a person and instantly liked and gotten along with them like an old friend? Maybe they were, in a previous life.

 

I know too many maybe's but truth is we don't know. All I will say as I have said before at death if Buddhism is proved to be 100% false doesn't it offer a rewarding way to lead this single one shot life we have? How many wars have Buddhists started? How angry are Buddhists considered to be? Look at how Buddhism is so dominant in Asian third world countries but look at how happy the people are there. In London I earned outrageous amounts of money and had everything I wanted without out waiting or getting a loan and it meant absolutely nothing to me. Now I have a little more than nothing possession wise but I am happier now than I have been my whole life.

 

They say the man who has everything in reality has nothing.......

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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Which is the best flavor of Buddhism? You've criticized some 'fake' monks--who's to say which is the correct flavor? How about that one sect, forget the name, that has a tv channel? Are you ok with them?

 

I have removed what I consider to be rants from your post to leave the questions I feel are justified as genuine.

 

Which is the best flavor of Buddhism? - what is the best flavor ice cream? What countries has the most attractive girls? Who are the best football team? Everyone on the Buddhist path is at different stages looking for different answers. The various lineages offer different angles but the teachings *Dhamma) is constant throughout. If you are seriously interested I would suggest trying to follow the Thai Theravada linage forst as its considered to be less strict than the other 2.

 

You've criticized some 'fake' monks--who's to say which is the correct flavor? - I have only ever criticized fake Monks in the context of them not actually being a Monk but someone dressing as a Monk to collect Alms (money) from people. I wont rant I will simply say karma will take care of them next time.

 

How about that one sect, forget the name, that has a tv channel? Are you ok with them? - I'm assuming you are referring to Wat/Phra Dhammakaya?

 

Dhammakaya_Temple_A22.jpg

 

My personal opinion is they are a disgrace and are nothing more than a cult. The temple cost an estimated 30 Billion Baht to built. Its will eventually be covered in 1 million Buddha statues but worst of all the Abbot is driven around in a brand new Rolls Royce. Personally I can not see one thing Buddhist about that and thats before we get onto the methods they use to raise money.

 

People donate to temples and Monks to help them and to also gain good karma. Wat Dhammakaya exploits the merit  making to the fullest extent preying on Bangkok's HiSo offering the then belief giving more means more karma. There are also another groups of people that have been doing this for years but I am not allowed to talk about them in an open forum.

 

Right expatdude thats you done. Let me get back to older pending questions and no more queue jumping ok. Get a ticket and wait in line like everyone else does! :Work1:

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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I  want to 2nd the question, "what do I do when we go to temple/wat .......ok shoes off, and then kneel and do the 3 wai to floor, showing "respect" ? to the head monk.......

After many trips to the family wat, they know I cannot kneel, and also bring me a chair to sit in, ( and a coffee and water) The head monk always takes a minute to say Hi, and the like ..........

So, what is the right thing to do when entering the temple ...............................

Mark

PS am in town and would love to have a cuppa and chat

M

Improving one Issan girls cash flow , one cash grant at a time !

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I  want to 2nd the question, "what do I do when we go to temple/wat .......ok shoes off, and then kneel and do the 3 wai to floor, showing "respect" ? to the head monk.......

After many trips to the family wat, they know I cannot kneel, and also bring me a chair to sit in, ( and a coffee and water) The head monk always takes a minute to say Hi, and the like ..........

So, what is the right thing to do when entering the temple ...............................

Mark

PS am in town and would love to have a cuppa and chat

M

 

 

Marko I actually sat down last night and started to reply to this question but as you can see the past couple of days have been wasted trying to keep this thread on track.

 

There will be a reply by the morning.

 

p.s. as for meeting up for a cuppa no thanks. Meeting up for a beer now thats more like it! Drop me a PM we can arrange it.

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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I  want to 2nd the question, "what do I do when we go to temple/wat .......ok shoes off, and then kneel and do the 3 wai to floor, showing "respect" ? to the head monk.......

After many trips to the family wat, they know I cannot kneel, and also bring me a chair to sit in, ( and a coffee and water) The head monk always takes a minute to say Hi, and the like ..........

So, what is the right thing to do when entering the temple ...............................

Mark

PS am in town and would love to have a cuppa and chat

M

Hey marko on behalf of Para welcome. Good to see you and nice to see a decent respectful question.

 

 

 

 

 

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Hey marko on behalf of Para welcome. Good to see you and nice to see a decent respectful question.

 

Apologies for my rudeness in not welcoming you thankfully Danca jumped in!

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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I  want to 2nd the question, "what do I do when we go to temple/wat .......ok shoes off, and then kneel and do the 3 wai to floor, showing "respect" ? to the head monk.......

After many trips to the family wat, they know I cannot kneel, and also bring me a chair to sit in, ( and a coffee and water) The head monk always takes a minute to say Hi, and the like ..........

So, what is the right thing to do when entering the temple ...............................

Mark

PS am in town and would love to have a cuppa and chat

M

 

Can I take a crack at this? I love how accepting people in Thailand are. Basically, whatever your situation, they'll accommodate your needs almost automatically and almost always respectfully.

 

For example, when I first moved here, I say a woman carrying books. Someone wai'ed her, she wai'd back with one hand. A similar example: if you only have one hand, wai'ing with one hand is quite acceptable. Another example, a friend came to visit with his 88 year old father. We went to a restaurant and after the meal the father wanted to pee. Since he was so old and a bit out of it, he started to try to pee right next to the table. The people around us just smiled and were obviously happy to see someone taking care of an old person--no one seemed offended in the least.

 

There are great things about being in Thailand--the Buddhist teaching that the Thai people learn contributes to these things to a large extent.

 

'Don't worry too much about how to act' is my opinion, they'll guide you. If you screw up, they'll gently laugh and correct you.

 

Oops, I jumped the queue. Some questions are easier to respond to than others. :D

 

Feel free to weigh in with a more Buddhist-specific answer.

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Can I take a crack at this? I love how accepting people in Thailand are. Basically, whatever your situation, they'll accommodate your needs almost automatically and almost always respectfully.

 

For example, when I first moved here, I say a woman carrying books. Someone wai'ed her, she wai'd back with one hand. A similar example: if you only have one hand, wai'ing with one hand is quite acceptable. Another example, a friend came to visit with his 88 year old father. We went to a restaurant and after the meal the father wanted to pee. Since he was so old and a bit out of it, he started to try to pee right next to the table. The people around us just smiled and were obviously happy to see someone taking care of an old person--no one seemed offended in the least.

 

There are great things about being in Thailand--the Buddhist teaching that the Thai people learn contributes to these things to a large extent.

 

'Don't worry too much about how to act' is my opinion, they'll guide you. If you screw up, they'll gently laugh and correct you.

 

Oops, I jumped the queue. Some questions are easier to respond to than others. :D

Expatdude if I read this right you are saying that the buddhist culture of Thailand contributes to making it what is. A wonderful place with some wonderful people.

 

If that is the case I agree with you there. To me its a very strong reason to at least take every opportunity to try and understand buddhism. That way I can understand the people I love so much. I guess its about respect hey.

 

How often have I asked a girl about why someone is doing something in relation to a shrine or something and all I got was o she do this for lucky for her.

 

I think anytime you throw humanity into the mix, nothing in any system of beliefs will be perfect but hey a beer, a laugh, thai food and a lovely thai lady is about as close to perfection as you can get in my book.

 

So I think we all agree that Thailand is a wonderful place. The people and their culture is what makes it so special.

 

 

 

 

 

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So I think we all agree that Thailand is a wonderful place. The people and their culture is what makes it so special.

 

I wouldn't be here if I didn't think it was wonderful.

 

Just a side note, there are many wonderful places in the world with many different kinds of wonderful people. I have chosen Thailand as my home, So I clearly agree with you. However, as I said, there are many great places and I chose this one because it was the one most suited to me in my experience.

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Can I take a crack at this? I love how accepting people in Thailand are. Basically, whatever your situation, they'll accommodate your needs almost automatically and almost always respectfully.

 

For example, when I first moved here, I say a woman carrying books. Someone wai'ed her, she wai'd back with one hand. A similar example: if you only have one hand, wai'ing with one hand is quite acceptable. Another example, a friend came to visit with his 88 year old father. We went to a restaurant and after the meal the father wanted to pee. Since he was so old and a bit out of it, he started to try to pee right next to the table. The people around us just smiled and were obviously happy to see someone taking care of an old person--no one seemed offended in the least.

 

There are great things about being in Thailand--the Buddhist teaching that the Thai people learn contributes to these things to a large extent.

 

'Don't worry too much about how to act' is my opinion, they'll guide you. If you screw up, they'll gently laugh and correct you.

 

Oops, I jumped the queue. Some questions are easier to respond to than others. :D

 

Feel free to weigh in with a more Buddhist-specific answer.

 

 

As expatdude has kindly offered his advice. If ever you are in a restaurant suffering from or with someone suffering from incontinence don't panic because Thai culture is genuinely so relaxed and the way they take care of the older members of the family should be used a a role model in the West. Also lose a hand don't be concerned about only havering one to 'wai' with.

 

Great antidotes but the relevance to the question asked regarding etiquette when in a Temple is kinda lost on me I am sorry.

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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It was an example of:

 

'Don't worry too much about how to act' is my opinion, they'll guide you. If you screw up, they'll gently laugh and correct you.

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As expatdude has kindly offered his advice. If ever you are in a restaurant suffering from or with someone suffering from incontinence don't panic because Thai culture is genuinely so relaxed and the way they take care of the older members of the family should be used a a role model in the West. Also lose a hand don't be concerned about only havering one to 'wai' with.

 

Great antidotes but the relevance to the question asked regarding etiquette when in a Temple is kinda lost on me I am sorry.

I think he was trying to say not to worry too much as they will give you the benefit of the doubt as a falang and not be offended if you don't know what to do. 

 

I already understand and appreciate that. I have experienced it first hand. My question was more aimed at how do I comport myself if I wish to do the thing properly according to the normal Thai practice.

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A BM I have immense respect for has just emailed me with a suggestion.

 

I'm going to take a time out for a while will be back when the time is right.

 

Have a great time on the thread and don't let it become a mess while I am away!

 

With metta

Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held.

Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin.

Believe nothing just because someone else believes it.

 

Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true.

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A BM I have immense respect for has just emailed me with a suggestion.

 

I'm going to take a time out for a while will be back when the time is right.

 

Have a great time on the thread and don't let it become a mess while I am away!

 

With metta

OK, Bye  :)

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....

 

p.s. as for meeting up for a cuppa no thanks. Meeting up for a beer now thats more like it! Drop me a PM we can arrange it.

 

Don't be fooled by Para when he say he only want beer. I spend 2 days with him in a bar last week and yes, there was a beer bottle in front of him all the time. But beer? No, that bottle was filled (i guess you gotta be English for that) with TEA!!!

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tomorrow will PM a place

Mark

Improving one Issan girls cash flow , one cash grant at a time !

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Great quote thanks for sharing it.

 

Buddhism is all about going inside yourself to understand yourself first. Why do certain things make me angry? Why does an certain action cause pleasure? Its like when they say you have to love yourself before you can truly love another.

 

You don't have to be a Buddhist to meditate but all (good!) Buddhist will meditate. Meditation is incredibly difficult at first the concepts and goal is to 'think nothing' Oh right like that possible how can you think nothing? With so many years of constantly thinking its hard very, very hard but with practice and patients you are slowly able to control the amount of rubbish that goes through your head. Once you stop thinking about whats for dinner and what is on TV you find yourself actually dealing with the things you would rather choose to forget that are locked away in the deepest most secure place you have in your head. We all have them rooms and boy aint they ugly?

 

Unresolved problems/emotions will just keep dragged  down. Sure a bit of denial will let you get away with it most of the time but all the time you carry the negativity you are attached to it and hey you know what attachment causes.

 

If anyone has ever read Phra Farrang (if not why not go and read it immediately!) throughout the book Phra Peter openly discussed a good 80% of the events he came across while ordained. The biggest thing he never spoke about was whet happened while he meditated.

 

I can tell you now at the start you are solely focused on trying to stop your mind from wandering. Once you have a reasonable grasp of that strange things start to happen. You can have some sessions where you are full of light and happiness and others were all you do is cry. Been there. The emotions we all try and bury need to come out and be dealt with maybe through simple acceptance of something that happened. Maybe from understanding as you start to see things in a slightly different way But regardless they have to be faced. A bad memory is simply an emotion that we don't attach to. If we feel it rising then allow it to come, tough when you know its going to hurt but trying not to think about it only ends up in attachment with the emotion staying around longer than if you had just let it come and go in its own time.

 

Danca's new avatar is the perfect example of how I tell people to deal with it when this happens. Think of the emotion as a butterfly. You see it floating in towards you and it settles on your arm say. Don't try and hold it or push it away because I promise you will go when it is ready. Repeating this enough times with even the hardest things in your own personal world of pain mental room will slowly resolve them.

 

Why have I waffled on about all that? Simply because true Buddhism is inside you not around your neck as a 50M baht Amulet or as the huge golden Buddha statue you donated to the local temple that just BS show fake Buddhists. Learn to understand yourself which is odd saying to a group of people the age we are but is true. Once you are able to start facing down the daemons you carry you will fell so much lighter and some much more able to continue facing your fears. Constantly questioning yourself and actions we call being 'mindful' which forms the core of the the way to reduce personal suffering The Eight Fold Path.

daddee, not danca, but thanks!!!  I do another type of meditation, and am told to let my mind do whatever it wants...   I find it hard to focus on not thinking...  but I keep breathing and doing my mantra, and have incredible insights and experiences while meditating...

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Following Pics come from Yes 2 Life facebook page:

 

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156998_10152701280855296_496700485_n.jpg

 

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482184_10152694453890296_418588886_n.jpg

 

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541211_10152705696545296_350736194_n.jpg

 

598762_10152686967140296_1554456250_n.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

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