Baht bus-driving nutters in Pattaya

December 2, 2011

As we head towards high season, I thought a trawl of topics dealing with the traditional hot chestnut of thieving, drugged up, abusive, pugilistic, dangerously-driving baht bus nutters would be instructive.

And so it was. If you never want to board one again.

These topics usually descend into a flaming, name-calling morass, with posters arguing about the outrageousness of being double-charged compared to Thais, and whether it is a matter of principle or cheapness to object.

Another issue is what to do when confronted by a baht bus driver screaming at you in the street or otherwise threatening to kick the crap out of you for a variety of reasons.

One post stood out on Thai Visa by Aussiechick who, a few years ago, was riding up front, with a clearly drunk baht bus driver.

She asked him to stop at the Tourist Police headquarters, and asked him to wait while she went to ask the police to arrest him, which they did.

Waatwang had another experience, which serves as a timely reminder of the dangers of riding shotgun:

The one that stopped was full, but the driver said I could sit inside the cab. I speak passable Thai and we started chatting. Everything was ok until he started making advances and offered me B2,000 to go to a hotel with him!

They must earn more than we think, or he really fancied her.

Sometimes I think posters bring ill-luck crashing down on their own heads, as they encounter more trouble in a week on baht buses than most of us do in a lifetime, collectively.

One poster, Ulysses G, admirably exemplifies the other extreme and confessed:

I was always skeptical about Pattaya baht bus drivers being crazy until I discreetly flipped one the bird and he chased me for about 3 blocks the wrong way on Beach road in his truck…!

One poster, Jingthing, had problems with the baht bus operators and loaders on Pattaya Second Road:

The loading man went totally postal on me….his alcoholism disease ravaged brain decided if I wasn't getting on the bus he ordered me to board, I wasn't going to be allowed on ANY bus. He started yelling at me, clearly ordering me to leave the scene of his sordid transport empire.

I felt pity for Smellyfarang who experienced a trip on a busy afternoon, driving through heavy traffic:

I happen to glance down through the back window and notice the driver is not only “steering” with his knees, he has his head down and is intently concentrating on some mesmerizing task that requires not only both hands, but apparently his full, undivided attention so much that he couldn’t be bothered with such distractions as actually looking out the windshield. Apparently he decided that driving through heavy traffic was the ideal time to roll a cigarette.

SirPaul attracted a lot of flak for his argument that baht bus drivers should be tipped 10 baht for every journey!

Then he revealed he was a London taxi driver, which accounted for this bizarre view.

Loong objected:

300 passengers a shift. If all tipped him for doing nothing extraordinary that would be 3,000 Baht every day, maybe 90,000 Baht per month. A good income for somebody whose only qualification is being able to drive.

Sure, but they could afford to splash out for more 2,000 baht short times with their sexy passengers at that rate.

Barry M was amazed that westerners who would demand prison sentences for parents who fail to properly secure their children in cars at home jump, grinning like Cheshire cats, with their kids into the back of these farm trucks often driven by half drunk muppets with no concept of safety.

And finally, Pistolbelt confessed to “giving change in 1 baht coins. I always save them in my back pocket for those bastards and sometimes only give them nine.

I'm real nasty see.