Bringing it to a peak

[Pattaya One]

Just where do you hide the family jewels?

I wandered into the Climax go-go (Soi 15, off Walking Street) very late one night recently and was reasonably impressed, especially as it was an early-in-the-week night and the den would have been unlikely to have its best assets on show. The overall quality of those who were still left to try and empty a wallet or six was not great, although hardly disappointing, with a variety of shapes and sizes. It was a friendly atmosphere, in that “buy me drink” way of most dens of the chrome pole; although I would have preferred it if the mamasan, who could best be described as a danger to shipping, had stayed away instead of trying to milk me for a raft of lady drinks.

The obligatory weird moment came when a ladyboy hostess came over, all nuts and butts and groping charm. Considering I thought I was in a go-go bar staffed exclusively by females, it was a little disconcerting to realise I was being propositioned by Lola of the well-concealed knob. The moment soon passed, but I still find it somewhat strange that so many places nowadays have a ladyboy or three lurking in the shadows. Maybe there is some equal opportunity employment ruling that we haven’t heard about which requires a nightlife venue to have a quota of those considered almost unemployable: gypsies, tramps, thieves, midgets, defeated Democrat parliamentarians, and ladyboys. No matter, Climax is worth another visit, although next time I’ll make sure it’s not half an hour before closing time.

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