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Thai culture ridiculous?


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Yesterday after spending Songkran in Pattaya i returned to Jomtien and as i was walking down the main strip by Shenanigans i had passed the bank of Ayudhya there was a big crowd of Thai people gathered watching something. As i turned round at the entrance to i think it is one of the View Talay the security guard was kicking the shite out of his girlfriend. I ran to try and stop him but by the time i reached him he had knocked his girlfriend unconscious and left her lying in the bushes and ran away. Rather than go for him i went to the girl and pulled her out the bushes and tried to bring her round, i got my girlfriend to go and buy some cold water to splash on her face and a older Thai women sat with me and tried to help the girl. Thai girl was totally out cold and burst mouth and bruised, i went over to the security guard and he is on his knees praying and another Thai man says to me it ok don`t worry? I went back to the Thai girl and she started slowly to come around then the scum security guard boyfriend comes and take her away with a friend on a motorbike. Sorry for the long explanation but my point is there were a load of Thai guys just standing watching and other Thai guys at the security box and not one of them did anything to help this girl stop taking a kicking? In my country Scotland had this happened the security guard would have been hospitalized by all the guys in the area for beating up a women as he guys would have kicked the shit out of the security guard. Don`t Thai guys have any morals or is it just common practice for them to use the girl as a punch bag?

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The longer you spend here the more you see and hear about Thai men and the less respect you'll have for them until eventually you'll start to consider them on a par with cockroaches and soi dogs. However, I must say that these sentiments are really for the low class, low educated Thai men. I have met a few very nice cultured and well educated Thai men for the upper classes of Thai society and they are totally different. They don't get drunk and beat their GFs in public and attack tourists.

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Yesterday after spending Songkran in Pattaya i returned to Jomtien and as i was walking down the main strip by Shenanigans i had passed the bank of Ayudhya there was a big crowd of Thai people gathered watching something. As i turned round at the entrance to i think it is one of the View Talay the security guard was kicking the shite out of his girlfriend. I ran to try and stop him but by the time i reached him he had knocked his girlfriend unconscious and left her lying in the bushes and ran away. Rather than go for him i went to the girl and pulled her out the bushes and tried to bring her round, i got my girlfriend to go and buy some cold water to splash on her face and a older Thai women sat with me and tried to help the girl. Thai girl was totally out cold and burst mouth and bruised, i went over to the security guard and he is on his knees praying and another Thai man says to me it ok don`t worry? I went back to the Thai girl and she started slowly to come around then the scum security guard boyfriend comes and take her away with a friend on a motorbike. Sorry for the long explanation but my point is there were a load of Thai guys just standing watching and other Thai guys at the security box and not one of them did anything to help this girl stop taking a kicking? In my country Scotland had this happened the security guard would have been hospitalized by all the guys in the area for beating up a women as he guys would have kicked the shit out of the security guard. Don`t Thai guys have any morals or is it just common practice for them to use the girl as a punch bag?

 

This is Thailand. And in Thai culture man don't interfere in another family problems. Maybe they have a big argument and the man was about to lose - face and the only one-way left.

 

The big question, is when to interfere, because if you interfere in family problems and they can easy turn around and attack you. The thai people watching will only interfere if it go far.

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It really depends on where you are. Playing in a band I have had to do work for bikie gangs here in Australia. They treat their women like shit but there is no way you're going to do anything about it.

If you try and step in you will be the next one to get the shit kicked out of.

I have had learned to just walk away and mind your own business.

 

Not saying it is right, but that's the way it is.

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I wouldn't get involved since you don't know the whole story, of course it is never right to beat a woman. However I have seen cases where a man stepped in to defend a woman being beaten by her boyfriend, and then the woman would defend her boyfriend against the guy trying to defend her.

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Yesterday after spending Songkran in Pattaya i returned to Jomtien and as i was walking down the main strip by Shenanigans i had passed the bank of Ayudhya there was a big crowd of Thai people gathered watching something. As i turned round at the entrance to i think it is one of the View Talay the security guard was kicking the shite out of his girlfriend. I ran to try and stop him but by the time i reached him he had knocked his girlfriend unconscious and left her lying in the bushes and ran away. Rather than go for him i went to the girl and pulled her out the bushes and tried to bring her round, i got my girlfriend to go and buy some cold water to splash on her face and a older Thai women sat with me and tried to help the girl. Thai girl was totally out cold and burst mouth and bruised, i went over to the security guard and he is on his knees praying and another Thai man says to me it ok don`t worry? I went back to the Thai girl and she started slowly to come around then the scum security guard boyfriend comes and take her away with a friend on a motorbike. Sorry for the long explanation but my point is there were a load of Thai guys just standing watching and other Thai guys at the security box and not one of them did anything to help this girl stop taking a kicking? In my country Scotland had this happened the security guard would have been hospitalized by all the guys in the area for beating up a women as he guys would have kicked the shit out of the security guard. Don`t Thai guys have any morals or is it just common practice for them to use the girl as a punch bag?

 

Firstly, yes, this is about Thai culture.

 

Secondly, you don't know what the girl did wrong. Maybe she did well deserve what she got.

Thai girls sometimes do very nasty things and not only to farangs.

What you witnessed is the way Thai guys deal with it.

The more years I live, the more I think it is not inherently wrong when it is well deserved and as long as no lasting damage is dealt. But knocking a girl out is beyond the limit IMO.

 

The other extreme is western countries where women get away with anything.

"it is never right to beat a woman" is valid in Western countries (cultural indoctrination).

Forget about that and many other things in Asia.

 

Thirdly, as Mognam said, as a farang, do not interfere in Thai matters. It brings infinitely more risks than potential benefits to anybody. All the more so as you are a farang and don't have full cultural understanding of what's happening and you are not able to read the signs that would tell other Thais when it gets dangerous.

The next thing that could happen is the guard fetches a gun from under his motorcycle seat, shoots you and then proceeds with beating the shit out of the girl.

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It's not just Thailand... In Asia in general it's considered kind of OK to beat your woman. It's not talked about but it's accepted that a man has to give his woman a clip now and then to keep her in line. You will find that some Thai women don't really mind and even expect the odd beating - they think there is something wrong with the relationship if their man doesn't whack them around now and then. They will even go out of their way to provoke their man into beating them from time to time because it cements the normalcy of the relationship for them.

 

The flip side is that even though us Westerners might not agree with Asian attitudes on beating women, it's almost part of the old school gender dynamic that makes the women here so submissively appealing.

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For anybody keen on breaking up fights:

 

A 19 year old Thai man is lucky to be alive after he was stabbed in the neck as he tried to break-up a fight between two groups of men during the Songkran festivities. Police were notified of the stabbing which occurred on Jomtien Beach Road in front of Soi 8 on Thursday Night as the water-fighting began to ease and a day of heavy drinking led to an altercation between two groups of 10 men for no apparent reason. Khun Balinyar decided to break-up the altercation between his friends and an opposing group of men, but instead was stabbed in his neck by a member of the opposing gang who then fled with his friends in the direction of Pattaya. Police have few clues as to who stabbed Khun Balinyar, who was rushed to Hospital and is currently in a serious but stable condition. Police are investigating.

 

http://www.pattayaone.net/pattaya-news/53512/19-year-stabbed-neck-attempts-break-up-fight-jomtien-beach/

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You did great my friend and more power to you.

 

More you mix with TG you will understand "Thai men no good"

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Secondly, you don't know what the girl did wrong. Maybe she did well deserve what she got.

 

"it is never right to beat a woman" is valid in Western countries (cultural indoctrination).

Forget about that and many other things in Asia.

 

 

Although I accept that within each society it varies, at times drastically, with what's acceptable or not, I refuse to simply abandon all my beliefs and turn a blind eye to everything I see because I'm not at home.

I myself find it hard to visualize what a lady can do that justifies being beaten like a dog as described by the OP.

 

Having said that, I don't think my beliefs would force me to get involved in this mess, I'd have had to let concern for my own well being over-ride the beating she took.

As wishy-washy as that may sound, self preservation can't simply evaporate because one witnesses violence, imho.

 

 

 

This is Thailand. And in Thai culture man don't interfere in another family problems.

 

The big question, is when to interfere, because if you interfere in family problems and they can easy turn around and attack you.

 

 

Not a question hard to answer as you seem to have done so within the same breath you asked.

 

 

Thirdly, as Mognam said, as a farang, do not interfere in Thai matters. It brings infinitely more risks than potential benefits to anybody. All the more so as you are a farang and don't have full cultural understanding of what's happening and you are not able to read the signs that would tell other Thais when it gets dangerous.

The next thing that could happen is the guard fetches a gun from under his motorcycle seat, shoots you and then proceeds with beating the shit out of the girl.

 

Put another way, don't interfere unless whatever is happening is something you truly feel is worth dying to try and stop as this could easily be the result.

 

Peace,

TM

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Although I accept that within each society it varies, at times drastically, with what's acceptable or not, I refuse to simply abandon all my beliefs and turn a blind eye to everything I see because I'm not at home.

I myself find it hard to visualize what a lady can do that justifies being beaten like a dog as described by the OP.

 

Having said that, I don't think my beliefs would force me to get involved in this mess, I'd have had to let concern for my own well being over-ride the beating she took.

As wishy-washy as that may sound, self preservation can't simply evaporate because one witnesses violence, imho.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not a question hard to answer as you seem to have done so within the same breath you asked.

 

 

 

 

Put another way, don't interfere unless whatever is happening is something you truly feel is worth dying to try and stop as this could easily be the result.

 

Peace,

TM

 

Good post.

 

I refuse to simply abandon all my beliefs and turn a blind eye to everything I see because I'm not at home.

Transpose this thought into an fervent Muslim living in the Western world and you get an idea of the pandora box this is.

 

I myself find it hard to visualize what a lady can do that justifies being beaten like a dog as described by the OP.

After living here for some time, my imagination can supply a limitless number of possible scenarios of what might have happened, ranging from she hid for a year that she got HIV positive fucking the guard's best friend or emptied the guy's stash of cash to send the 30k (possibly all of the man's savings which he possibly needed to pay his mother's hospital bill or something) to her mother who had to repay a gambling debt.

 

You see, in Thailand, everything is interconnected, so that a simple theft of cash is not just a simple theft of cash, it can threaten someone's life.

 

Put another way, don't interfere unless whatever is happening is something you truly feel is worth dying to try and stop as this could easily be the result.

Yes, and there are very few things that qualify.

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Who are we to judge their culture & also the situation? Women have the power to inflict pain with words & men with their fists so who created this imbalance of power in the west, which is especially irrelevant in the modern western age of equality?

 

Of course one should start with the principal that it is morally wrong to either physically or psychologically damage another person, or animal etc if that is your belief, then add in qualifiers or exceptions; if a woman killed my children then I would consider it justifiable to use physical violence, for example.

 

We don't know anything about the circumstances either! He could have been told by his GF that he was being jilted for another man & entered a state of 'temporary insanity', which seems the case as the immediate act of prayer indicates remorse.

 

Some have mentioned that this behaviour is indicative of men of low socioeconomic status in Thailand but this could be said of men in all cultures, who lack the articulateness to defend themselves verbally against the expert & caustic assaults from females. It could also be said the shivelress rule of a man 'not hitting (inflicting physical damage on) a woman' belongs to the lower or 'non thinking' classes!

 

On what basis was this 'rule' created? If it's based on the fact that women are on average physically weaker then shouldn't there be a similar rule stating that it is just as wrong to hit a man who's physically weaker? I suspect it arose due to the deep seated biological imperative men have to protect women, which is in turn based on the child like attributes possessed by women; in other words it's due to blind, reasonless emotion.

 

Let's try & use the cerebral cortex that we were born with once in a while!

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It's always very sensitive to interfer in a fight, and more in asian countries where knives and guns can come out very quickly.

 

To answer the topic question, yes, Thai and almost all cultures in the world are ridiculous. Doing stupid things just because everybody does, and just because ancestors used to do it doesn't bring humans far above animals.

 

Culture is the best way to stop anyone's creativity and evolution. It's the best way to keep humans at same level when we used to live in caves.

 

Of course, there are always things that can looks nice or funny, but there are so many horrors around the world done in the name of culture that it's very hard for me to say culture is not ridiculous.

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Most Thais will not interfere because of this hierarchy social stuff. They don't know whos family has bigger connections, in addition to that, lots of weapons around, and most security have a team of people that will turn up when they need it. If you lay into a security guard, his workers will come and protect him. IMO

 

Police always laugh at farang complaining about there Thai girlfriends attacking them or something, they alway say, why dont you give her a slap. I think its totally wrong but women are low down here, we put them on a pedestal in the UK and they now have power over us and no selection left.

 

Hitting a weaker human being that is vunerable, is wrong, man or woman. If you get between some of these fights, it could be a loss of face, or the anger will shift to you.

 

I have noticed most fights between farang, is just chest showing, they are happy to be split up, but when its domestic its often nasty and meaningful,

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Pretty good advice so far and twisted mike and laa mok have it pretty much covered. For me unless i knew the girl then it's none of my business. It is a western mindset to rescue the weaker party. The truth is we don't know the situation or the dynamic and it is absolutely ego driven to interfere and somehow think we are doing the "right" thing. Somehow our values are better and more important. I call it the prince on a white horse syndrome.

 

We are in a foreign country as guests we are not there to tell people how to live their lives. Right or wrong the people here and their countrymen are the people to sort out a domestic situation not a foreigner imparting their view of the world.

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I grew up in Perth and outback NW Australia and reading some of the comments posted in this thread brought back memories. As a teen and a young man I often saw Aboriginals beating the crap out of their wives in pubs/streets/parks but the word was never intervene because the gin (Aboriginal woman) would turn on you and defend her hubby, who was knocking 9 shades of shite out of her. So we'd walk past Abos who were whacking the missis and never look back.

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You did great my friend and more power to you.

 

More you mix with TG you will understand "Thai men no good"

lol i never understood thai women leave thai men .pattaya is a fcuked up place cos majority of ppl not in their state of mind .hopefully my last trip to pattaya.
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Its difficult I know but interfering can bring its own problems. :SoWhat1:

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my advice, stay out of it!!! the more us foreigners think we can change the way thais live their lives, the more thailand will end up being like england, and nobody wants that.

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Your not in Scotland, dont compare, its South East Asia and there are many parts of UK taken over these days by others/Muslims where this would happen the same.

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It's not just Thailand... In Asia in general it's considered kind of OK to beat your woman.  It's not talked about but it's accepted that a man has to give his woman a clip now and then to keep her in line.  You will find that some Thai women don't really mind and even expect the odd beating - they think there is something wrong with the relationship if their man doesn't whack them around now and then.  They will even go out of their way to provoke their man into beating them from time to time because it cements the normalcy of the relationship for them.

 

The flip side is that even though us Westerners might not agree with Asian attitudes on beating women, it's almost part of the old school gender dynamic that makes the women here so submissively appealing.

 

yep had my tg ex call me a pussy when i didnt whack her,and she did deserve one.

Who is fit to govern others?

 

He who governs himself. ?

 

You might as well have said: nobody.

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Just because the place ( Pattaya ) is full of farangs don't think for one minute that these Thai men have adopted any Farang ways...or have any values of the west...In the west ..YES...we do argue with our women .. NO..we don't " belt the suitcases out of them"...

 

U cant say all Thai males R bad....All U have to do is take a taxi to BKK....and use the Skytrain to get around and you will see very normal behavior by very normal Thais.

 

Saying all that ....In Patts...I did leg sweep a farang guy who was arguing with this thai GF ... I was walking out of my hotel......heard ppl yelling and pushing.....the argument turned nasty and he grabbed her throat.....I dropped him with a leg sweep....and continued on my merry way..from that day on all the motor taxi guys near my hotel corner..greeted me every time I went in and out of my hotel.

I didn't know the full story...but I do know that U can resolve thiings with a women with out almost choking her to death

"You only get two pieces of ass in your life. Your first and your last." Everything in between is extra gravy and I love extra gravy.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Well the problem is that there are some people who have a different view about it. They can rather give some form of reason why they did that, though most of what they are to say will not probably work to your advantage and for the betterment of the whole case, but nonetheless, something that will explain why they did such.

 

That is not to describe how ridiculous things could be but rather just a simple reminder of how they value each other.

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  • 8 months later...

Hm...

 

Thai  men bad?  Thai culture?

 

Comrade--we, americans, invaded in Iraq and killed over million innocent women, kids and others.

 

Do you wanna compare?

 

We, americans, spend in Afganistan over 10 years for no visible reason.

 

Wake up!.

 

And I read every day how we kill each other in USA.

 

Have a nice vacation and stop thinking in wrong direction.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Well, the views of most of us about the culture of LoS is vbased on the fact that we interact with people of a certain way of life and educational as well as ethical backround. But this is only a tiny percentage of what Thailand really is. If you interact with people from outside the sex scene, you ll see a very different way of life and thinking. And always bare in mind that Budhism, which is a big part of everybody, is basiclly a philospophy and not a dogmatic religion. 

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